Year after Year

Were just to lost souls swimming in a fish bowl.
Year after Year.

Running over the same old grounds.

What Have We Found? The Same old fears?

Wish You Were Here...

lovely

Big City Dreamin

serendipity de la vie

where nobody knows

Our hearts were drunk with a beauty

our eyes were to blind to see.

Watts Gs

stuck in the game

and maybe maybe it was all a lie, a figment of my imagination,

all i know is that i never had those feelings, these feelings for anyone else,

i have never and feel as if i may never again say the things

that i did to you to anyone else,

but what makes it seem all to pointless now,

is that i am not the only girl you have made feel like this over the past year,

as I read and see what happens to the others around me that have had the "blessing" of your presence in their romantic lives i see to many familiar moments and situations,

good and bad happen to them as I did me,

and as i read the happy moments they write about or see them when with you

i also see and hear the doubtful moments too and its just this never ending cycle,

nothing feels real anymore, and you have become one big lie

and as much as i want to believe everything we once had and still go through today

it all seems pretty much a joke,

because from what i have gathered it just seems like something you do with everyone,

your so good at your own game that your lost in it

and one by one you drag more players in so you can remain the winner,

all i know is that you were my first love,

and what a epic one at that.

You completely fucked me up

so congratulations

YOU win!

rfdghvdjsdh;fds

Always surrounded by such fucking amazing people,

yet there is still this feeling of emptiness

lingering around my head and my heart.

I Just don't get it!

I can't just sit back and wallow in my own sorrow

and life is just gonna keep moving

& I've gotta keep up

otherwise i'll just get left behind...

Breathe Me.

Hold me, wrap me up
Unfold me
I am small
I'm needy
Warm me up
And breathe me

Ouch I have lost myself again
Lost myself and I am nowhere to be found,
Yeah I think that I might break
I've lost myself again and I feel unsafe

and the worst part is there is no one else to blame.

stranger

I'm really not myself at the moment

& I haven't been for a while now...

Whatever "myself " is?

I hope I find out soon.

Take My Breath Away

I Miss This Feeling...

one life.one love

Gandhi said

"what you do in your lifetime will be insignificant,

but it is most important that you do it"

I've been thinking about this alot lately,

I have failed recently at a fair few endeavours in my life that I atleast thought I put so much time and effort into.

In certain situations some of that failure came about due to my lack of focus and persistence to continue and follow things through as always I get bored or distracted from what needs to be done.

Others I guess were just not meant to be.

I think i have been overwhelmed and daunted lately with the fact of life that is growing old, and the change that comes with it,

sometimes I feel as if everything I do is pointless

and you know what it most likely is,

but just like Gandhi said doesn't mean i shouldn't' do it,

because you only live once,

so why not try and do it all, whatever it is, have a go and yer maybe fail

but atleast be proud because you gave it a go.

Be happy because you learnt something from that,

if we did all the things we were capable of doing we would probably not only amaze the people around us but ourselves too,

so I'm gonna try!

Try to be happy and try to live my life to the fullest

I may take a break from this whole positive attitude side of things once in a while but I guess it is all about balance,

and for now that is something I need greatly.

Description of a Fool!

FOOL.

"

Defined in webster's
open up the book, read it read it
turn the page, see what it says
read it to me will you please

One who acts dope ???
so what does it mean to me?)
that's you !!!

cos of the way you act

what's the matter wit'cha boy?
you big galoot.you nincompoop.

what's wrong wit you?

you can't compute ??

don't fix your lips to tell me you can

what you got to do with yourself?
can't you be somebody else?
look at you described to a tee

you're a fool of many in society
i know some more, i shall go on
and continue in the song,

fooled the fool
said

"forget him,

don't you know he's a loser"
who would love a woman turn around and abuse her

only a fool as described by the tribe

Here's another one who's on the fool vibe

gonna make it short, gonna make it quick
for this situation makes me sick
see your brother man, with the female
he's crazy ego tryed to show he'll prevail

In any situation lady luck's on his side
emotions run free

nothing he will hide
the girl just laughed and laughed and laughed at him

he felt "ashamed "

for what he had done
it looked like a fool to everyone

he is sometimes a ditty yeah uh huh!
like earth to your brain...

is anyone home?
i see ya there, tryin to make amends
try to make some friends

but now my story ends!

On the note, that i just wrote
stay afloat on the reality boat

slow down and think and take it cool
and try to avoid the

description of a FOOL!

"

where i stood

I don't know what I've done
Or if I like what I've begun
But something told me to run
And honey you know me it's all or none

There were sounds in my head
LIttle voices whispering
That I should go and this should end
Oh and I found myself listening

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

See I thought love was black and white
That it was wrong or it was right
But you ain't leaving without a fight
And I think I am just as torn inside

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood

And I won't be far from where you are if ever you should call
You meant more to me than anyone I ever loved at all
But you taught me how to trust myself and so I say to you
This is what I have to do

'Cos I dont know who I am, who I am without you
All I know is that I should
And I don't know if I could stand another hand upon you
All I know is that I should
'Cos she will love you more than I could
She who dares to stand where I stood
Oh, she who dares to stand where I stood

BLABLABLA BULLSHIT!

Everyone can see it but you!
Actions speak louder then words
and you my friend when it comes to that

are just one big FUCKWIT!

What do you want from me!

So here's to the possibilities.

Either you end this unknown

and tell me how you really feel

or I just walk away.

Even being just friends with you is too hard.

I need to move on.

I can't be stuck waiting any longer...

Beginning of the End.

I know I should be excited and I truly am,

but to be honest I am also a little nervous,

I know the day will come

and I will most likely feel the same as the day before

but I know there is so much more

that comes with being 18,

so many more responsibilities,

so much more pressure from society,

and just so many things

I will need to start taking into consideration,

I don't know if I'm ready but I'm going to try to be and I will attempt to enjoy every minute of it,

I think I will always deep down be young at heart,

I just know now I need to start behaving

more like an "adult",

I need to let go of all the childish drama that has been holding me back for the past few years and realise

I know longer need that kind of bullshit.

18

Make a wish and hope it turns out ok,

the beginning of the end,

and the start of my new journey into the "real world"

...exciting stuff!

Day #7

A picture of someone/something that has the biggest impact on you:

Grandad

You never really know how much you appreciate

or miss someone

till there gone.

sitting.waiting.wishing

perfect lyrics

You want me to come over I got an excuse
Might be holding your hand, but im holding it loose
Go to talk then we choke its like our necks in a noose
Avoid the obvious we should be facing the truth

Start to think it could be fizzling out
Kinda shocked because I never really had any doubts
Look into your eyes imagine life with out ya

And the love kick starts again
Starts again

And the Love kick starts again
Starts again

Its the same old you the same old me
You get bored and I get cold feet
Get high get wandering eyes
Forget ive never ever had it so sweet
I realise what I got when Im out of town

small small world