Adios 2011!!!

In a blink of an eye, the year has come and gone faster then the last,everything that mattered last year doesn't anymore and I'm sure soon it will be the same case for this upcoming one. This year for me was meant to be about self discovery, figuring out what I want from life, from the people around me and most importantly myself and to be honest I don't think I am fully satisfied with what I have discovered so far. Although this year I have laughed, I've cried, I've been scared, overwhelmed,found, euphoric, angry,frustrated,lost,envious, contempt, crazed, loved, supported, misunderstood, understanded, appreciated, invisible, adored, fallen in love,broken,hurt,rejected and been rejected. All the above good and bad life changing experiences yet I feel like I am still standing still year after year, everyone else is moving on and I'm still just here where ever "here" is where I started, every year I take a few steps forward and then somehow start walking backwards back to the start. This year I feel a change is going to come and a big one at that and if it does not then I may just believe that I have given up. Given up on myself and all those long lost dreams and desires that have somehow been forgotten over the years. This year if anything, has shown me what a lonely place the world can be, it's not necessarily that I'm alone it's the fact that I am on my own. For this new and fast approaching year, I hope to realize to be alone with ones self and truly like the company that you can keep in those empty moments, because at the end of the day no matter how hard you fight it, it's inevitable you only have yourself to rely on and nobody else and that is a fact I will not only come to terms with that this year but I will also embrace it with my arms wide open