This is the term i have now gathered you use often when referring to me. I don't know why i let you get to me or why i still have a small place in my heart reserved for you. I hate it though. Why after all the hurt and all the pain i have felt because of you and your remarks, and nasty opinions you have about me. I always looked up to you and respected you for how well you presented yourself, how well you kept it together, how much responsibility you showed for your life and how mature yet sweet you were. I may act and look like a big kid but deep down you are just as petty and "childish" with your silly games and how easily you are amused by how my life has turned out. I know i was not a perfect friend we both had our good and bad sides, i know i took you for granted sometimes but you are just as guilty as i am. You were in such a rush to act all "grown up" when i was still in the process of "growing up". The way we ended was never really that dramatic as you seem to make it out to be, it was really something that could have been easily resolved or if not it we could have at least been civil and kind and stayed out of each others lives and affairs politely and considerately but no, you wanted none of that, instead you decided to turn it into us having complete and utter hate for each other you wanted us to be enemies. You are always claiming that you have "
disposed" of me to everyone around you, yet i feel as if you are still holding on, but not in the good kind of way. I know for a fact that you speak Ill of me to complete strangers, and consume allot of your spare time in laughing and amusing yourself with my misfortune, you pretend that you know everything about me and my life with another special someone when in reality you frankly don't know shit! Don't get me wrong i am not trying to flatter myself in anyway, i can be just as pathetic, but if it was up to me i would have no signs of hate towards you. YOU! know i tried my best to make this work out or at least end with the book closed for good. You may speak better then me, your life at the moment may be better off, you might be "happier" without me but you broke my heart, it still makes me sad to think that for someone i used to love and care for so much and someone who i thought i knew could carry on like this and be so nasty...i never intentionally meant to hurt you, i never meant to to be selfish, i just had never dealt with certain things at that stage of my life and i had no idea how to handle them but i honestly don't think i was that bad of a friend. I wish i didn't hate you, i wish you didn't hate me...i wish it all worked out differently. I miss being a kid with you, i miss our stupid accents and our random dress ups i miss the stupid nonsense filled nights...i don't miss you i miss the old you...i miss having my bestfriend.
This is the term i have now gathered you use often when referring to me. I don't know why i let you get to me or why i still have a small place in my heart reserved for you. I hate it though. Why after all the hurt and all the pain i have felt because of you and your remarks, and nasty opinions you have about me. I always looked up to you and respected you for how well you presented yourself, how well you kept it together, how much responsibility you showed for your life and how mature yet sweet you were. I may act and look like a big kid but deep down you are just as petty and "childish" with your silly games and how easily you are amused by how my life has turned out. I know i was not a perfect friend we both had our good and bad sides, i know i took you for granted sometimes but you are just as guilty as i am. You were in such a rush to act all "grown up" when i was still in the process of "growing up". The way we ended was never really that dramatic as you seem to make it out to be, it was really something that could have been easily resolved or if not it we could have at least been civil and kind and stayed out of each others lives and affairs politely and considerately but no, you wanted none of that, instead you decided to turn it into us having complete and utter hate for each other you wanted us to be enemies. You are always claiming that you have "disposed" of me to everyone around you, yet i feel as if you are still holding on, but not in the good kind of way. I know for a fact that you speak Ill of me to complete strangers, and consume allot of your spare time in laughing and amusing yourself with my misfortune, you pretend that you know everything about me and my life with another special someone when in reality you frankly don't know shit! Don't get me wrong i am not trying to flatter myself in anyway, i can be just as pathetic, but if it was up to me i would have no signs of hate towards you. YOU! know i tried my best to make this work out or at least end with the book closed for good. You may speak better then me, your life at the moment may be better off, you might be "happier" without me but you broke my heart, it still makes me sad to think that for someone i used to love and care for so much and someone who i thought i knew could carry on like this and be so nasty...i never intentionally meant to hurt you, i never meant to to be selfish, i just had never dealt with certain things at that stage of my life and i had no idea how to handle them but i honestly don't think i was that bad of a friend. I wish i didn't hate you, i wish you didn't hate me...i wish it all worked out differently. I miss being a kid with you, i miss our stupid accents and our random dress ups i miss the stupid nonsense filled nights...i don't miss you i miss the old you...i miss having my bestfriend.
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